The Importance of Self-Love for Cat Lovers
The other night, I realized I had done all the things.
Fed Bear. Played with Bear. Refreshed his water. Cleaned his space.
Checked in on how he was feeling. Made sure he was comfortable.
But then I sat down… and noticed I hadn’t checked in with myself once.
Not in a real way.
I think a lot of us who love cats move through our days like this,
quietly attuned, always noticing, always caring.
And somewhere along the way, we forget that we need that same care, too.
Why Cat Lovers Put Ourselves Last
If you’re a cat person, you probably already know this about yourself:
You’re observant.
You feel things deeply.
You notice subtle shifts in your cat, in your home, in the energy around you.
But it also means you might:
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take responsibility for keeping everything “okay”
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feel your cat’s discomfort almost as if it’s your own
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struggle to fully relax, even when nothing is technically wrong
And over time, that constant awareness is exhausting.
This is why self care for cat lovers isn’t just a nice idea, it’s something deeper, something necessary.
The Impact of Neglecting Self-Care
It doesn’t always look dramatic and I think this is why we can allow the neglect to continue.
Sometimes it’s just:
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waking up already a little tense
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feeling overstimulated by small things
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being tired in a way sleep doesn’t fix
Or that subtle edge where everything feels slightly harder than it should.
That’s usually not a lack of effort.
It’s your nervous system asking for something it hasn’t been getting,
something that self care naturally supports, when it’s practiced consistently and gently.
What Self-Love Looks Like
Self-love gets talked about in a way that can feel disconnected.
It’s not all bubble baths and “treat yourself” moments.
For Highly Sensitive People like us, it’s deeper.
It’s:
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noticing when you’re overwhelmed before you hit your limit
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giving yourself permission to pause without earning it first
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letting yourself soften instead of constantly trying to hold everything together
It’s not about doing more.
If anything, it’s about letting yourself do less without guilt creeping in five minutes later.
Self-love is nurturing a deeper connection with oneself, knowing all parts of yourself and loving all of them.
Simple Self-Care Routines That Help
Most of the time, it’s not big routines that shift things but the small moments that actually help.
Like sitting next to your cat and taking a slower breath than usual.
Or pausing for a second and asking yourself, “wait… how am I actually doing?”
These are the kinds of moments that make self care for cat lovers feel do-able. It’s not just another thing on your list, but something you’re already naturally moving toward.
Sometimes I’ll just sit and watch Bear clean himself. I find this extremely calming and regulating.
There’s something about how not-in-a-rush he is.
How he doesn’t think about whether he’s allowed to rest.
It pulls me out of my own overthinking, self-doubting thoughts.
Aside from slow breathing with your cat, here are a few things to consider:
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Ground by standing barefoot outside on the grass
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Naming emotions as they arise (“I feel overwhelmed”)
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Habit-stack with your cat’s routine by adding a healthy new habit you’d like to develop to an existing part of your cat’s routine - for example: when you change their water, fill a large glass for yourself. (Read more on habit-stacking with your cat)
How Cats Support Emotional Wellness
This is one of my favorite things about cats.
They don’t try to fix anything.
They don’t chop-chop and try to rush you out of how you feel.
They just stay and help hold space...for wherever we’re at.
And we love that. Because.... it....
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slows our breathing
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softens our body
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brings us back into the present
Even a few minutes of that kind of connection can shift our whole state.
Creating a Simple Self-Love Ritual
Cultivating self-love is something that builds and deepens over time when we practice consistent loving actions towards ourselves. Often, we tend to take a “loving” action when we’re forced to, like finally resting because now we’re sick.
It’s the small, sustainable, simple and repeatable actions that make it easy to be consistent with our self-love practice. Remember, don’t underestimate the power of taking small consistent action.
Maybe it looks like:
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a few quiet minutes with your cat in the morning
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a breath before you reach for your phone
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a small check-in at the end of the day
Nothing elaborate.
Just something that reminds you and your body that you are safe, something your nervous system can rely on.
Being a Highly Sensitive Person is difficult and especially, a Highly Sensitive Cat Lover. We care so much about everything: our cat, our space, the energy in our home. But being an HSP doesn't have to come at the cost of ourselves and our health.
Self-love isn’t something extra we have to earn. But it is definitely something we must practice and learn. Self-care may not always be easy but it will be the thing that allows us to keep showing up, for ourselves and especially our cats!
So if you can’t yet do it for yourself, do it for your cat!
Thank you, this is so wonderful!! Appreciate your good words to help us.. and always the dear kitties.
~~For the kitties, Carol
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Love and Above Cat Club replied:
Hi Carol! Thanks so much for reading and for taking the time to comment and share some love! Have a great Friday and weekend!
I am starting to realize I take after my mom. I raised to be a caregiver. I take care of my husband, my cats and the house, do all the cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, laundry (lots of it) and help my husband with his fairly newly diagnosed health issues. I call my mom and my neighbor every morning to see how they are doing, since they are both alone. I even feed stray cats at my house. I am always trying to stay upbeat and cheer someone up, even though I have found myself going through depression more and more every day, along with high anxiety. I just don’t find the time for myself anymore. I need to try to follow your advice and try to learn self care.
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Love and Above Cat Club replied:
Hi Janine! Thank you for reading the blog and for sharing. I can understand what you’re saying and have gone through similar layers. It’s tough, really tough to take care of yourself when you’ve taken care of others most of your life! For me, the depression and anxiety just snowballed the more I neglected my own care. I’ve found that taking time for myself first thing in the morning (well, after I feed and groom Bear the cat!) is what works. Some days, it can be a longer stretch of time, other days, it’s only 15 minutes. But I believe that the message we send to ourselves by doing something for ourselves first thing is extremely loving – “I’m important too. I matter.” I think as you get used to doing it, you’re also rewiring a part of your brain that will start to welcome in self-care and it will no longer feel so foreign or difficult. I hope that resonates! Sending lots of love!
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